Saturday, May 06, 2006
Heya... himala, I finally updated! Wala lang, just to show that I am still relatively
alive... Kasi naman e, nagloloko ung bwsit na internet connection, and blogger does not want to cooperate in the rare times I can go OL... Anyway...
I'll be changing my blog layout soon... I really adore this lonely blogskin, but I dunno, I want to try something new... So expect a change of blogskin in the upcoming month or so! :)
It's amazing how a new interest or two can take your mind off loneliness and such. I found new obsessions in playing my guitar, in the lost interest of french knitting, in writing fanfiction, in the watching and making of fandom music videos, and in watching animes such as Card Captor Sakura, Fushigi Yuugi, Tsubasa Chronicle, Inuyasha, and the like. It's such that I don't even think about my loss (you would all know this, so I won't bother explaining). I guess keeping busy really does help, ne?
I really miss a lot of people... Pisay people, of course, and some of my other friends from other schools and places. I can't help but realize how fortunate I was to have made it to Pisay, and actually manage to stay in Pisay.
Which is saying something, because my terrible Math grade nearly cost me a spot in the next year and the title of being a sophomore. It shows that I didn't really focus throughout the year, because during fourth quarter, when I went through a lot of changes and put practically my entire being into pulling up my grades, my fourth quarter GPA is the highest among all four quarters. Grabe, kung ganitong kapangit na ang grades ko sa freshie year ko lang, paano pa sa sophie year ko???
I don't know, I feel really uncertain from time to time on my feelings for this upcoming
school year. It's second year, sophomore year - the year with the most units and the least breaks, the year where some achieve and others break, the year of changes and challenges - I have good reason to be worried. Seeing how poorly I have performed in my freshman year, just the mere thought of the subject matter I will be tackling in less than two months' time is enough to make me shudder. It's not mere coincidence why 'sophomore' sounds very much like 'suffer more'.
There's also the question of who my classmates, and hopefully my dorm roommates, will be. I did not do too well in the dormmates category, given that there was a sort of cold war between me and my roommates. I loved them terribly, but there was just too much difference between us to work things through. That, and add my not-so-great health, was enough for me to pull out of the dorm for the rest of fourth quarter. I really am praying that, if I can return to the dorm this year, I will not cause my roommates such problems, and that we can get along.
I also am unsure about my classmates. I surely will miss Topaz, no matter how hellish my experience was with them. Heck, I had fun, didn't I? That was enough to help me get through whatever trials they threw at me. I hope that I get my Topaz best friends (you know who you are, too!) as classmates once more this year, and that I also get my good friends from the other sections (yep, you should know who you are), so that my sophomore year in Pisay will not only be fruitful, but fun as well.
Okay, I think I've pondered enough for one post. I will see you guys soon... Chika tayo 'pag enrollment na, 'kay? I miss you all so much!
~~ Eruanne
current mood: thoughtful, missing my friends! (guys, magkita naman tayo sana!) current music: Platinum from Card Captor Sakura (I told you I was obsessed with it)
2:40 PM